Everything is not fair in love!

“He was the most illiterate person who said everything is fair in love and war because if this is true then the man who throws acid on a girl in the name of love is also fair, and our soldiers who died because of a war are also fair”. – Jolly LLB 2

In the OTT era where violence, force and abuses somehow confine into love we forget the harsh reality of our society behind that glamorise world of fiction. From an obsessive lover Radhe (Tere naam) to kabir (Kabir singh); the characters might have changed but misogyny in our society doesn’t. The era which was famous for Govinda movies blurred the lines between eve-teasing and romance.on one hand movie Pink taught us the definition of the Word “No” on the other hand Raanjhanaa overlooked that statement.

We have grown up watching movies which unintentionally taught us to behave in a particular way. Movies and characters set various trends weather its fashion, morality or evolution. Before jumping into that narrative that the movies create let’s see few brutal results in our society:

  • Nikita Tomar, a 21-year-old girl from Haryana, was shot dead because she refused to marry the accused.
  • Malvi Malhotra, a 29-year-old actress, was stabbed by a man allegedly for turning down his marriage proposal.
  • A 17-year-old girl was assaulted and raped for rejecting a marriage proposal by the accused.
  • A nurse was burnt alive by her boyfriend in Vijaywada after she refused to marry him and tried to end the relationship.

When we promote violence in the name of love, we forget these brutal cases among many more prevailing in society. When we blur the lines between Eve teasing and crazy things in love we promote such incidents to happen. When we call Kabir Singh- “Romance of the era”, we forget to question ourselves that what if Preeti said no to Kabir at any point of time?

In 2011 when Raanjhanaa made its remark as a romantic story, we ignore the obsessiveness of Kundan even after Zoya said initially. When Zoya offers him the friendship he was eager to convert it in love. When we encourage such acts of characters onscreen meanwhile make it happily ever after and ideal, it gives rise to these brutal incidents and makes them justified.

The misrepresentation of the characters is not just limited to India but all around the world. The famous film along with its three sequels Fifty Shades of Grey won the hearts of people across the world. Grey’s chivalrous character and Ana’s obedient love is not what Fifty shades of grey are promoting. Christian Grey is an abuser who stalked and manipulated Ana character.  

In real life, this would be considered as a violation of human rights and totally unethical. From stalking Ana to making her sign a BDSM contract which basically states how Ana should exactly satisfy Grey. But what if Ana rejected it? Actually, she did but that NO cannot stop Grey to try. And this is how such a fantasy tale confuses people with real-life incidents.

To understand it we need reject all those superficial characters which replace Violence, misogyny, and everything that is unethical with love because everything is not fair in love!

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